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It's time...to talk...about RETRIBUTION...
The story of RETRIBUTION is one that just got worse and worse...and worse...until it ended. It started in August last year when an episode of RAW saw frequent technical issues before a group of black-clad masked individuals were seen setting fire to a generator outside the Performance Center. Identifying themselves as wrestlers held down by the WWE system, RETRIBUTION would show up over the next few weeks, cause chaos, jump around and yell and...not really do anything else. Like, they ran in the ring during SmackDown...and didn't attack anybody. They threw a cinderblock through a glass door...and then left. They flipped a car...and then left. Nothing they did really meant anything. One time they ran in during the main event of RAW between Drew McIntyre and Keith Lee, only for them to get beat up by them & the Hurt Business even though they had a 6-to-9 advantage. They were ineffective goobers from day 1. At this point, everyone was like "This is awful." Well, it gets worse.Almost two months after they debuted, RETRIBUTION revealed their identities as they were given contracts on RAW. This also came with a thinning of their ranks, as the nameless masked goofballs were replaced by NXT's Dominik Dijakovic, Mia Yim, Mercedes Martinez, Dio Maddin, and Shane Thorne. Only they debuted looking like this: Granted, four of them are not the worst masks in the world, but my god, what did they have Shane Thorne wearing? It looks like a stack of paper plates with eye holes cut out. On top of that, and despite the fact that Maddin had been a commentator on RAW in 2019 and Thorne had wrestled on RAW just three months before this, they weren't debuting as Dijakovic, Yim, Martinez, Maddin, and Thorne. They got brand new names, and they're genuinely some of the worst WWE has come up with. The names were:
- T-BAR for Dominik Dijakovic
- RECKONING for Mia Yim
- RETALIATION for Mercedes Martinez
- MACE for Dio Maddin
- and SLAPJACK for Shane Thorne
A couple of things. First off, what the fuck is a T-BAR? Second, if you somehow don't understand why SLAPJACK is a bad name, just take a trip to Urban Dictionary to see why. Third, the next time WWE tries to tell you that NXT is a third brand equal to RAW and SmackDown and not a developmental brand, just refer to the fact that they took four established NXT wrestlers (Maddin hadn't appeared on NXT TV when he debuted) and completely changed their gimmicks, appearances, and names for their RAW debuts. Fourth, any compelling story you could tell with these five is thrown out the window by repackaging them. Instead of disgruntled NXT wrestlers, they're just random goons with dumb names that everyone on the roster has to pretend they've never met. It would be one thing if they all changed their looks like Dijakovic did, but you're telling me the commentary team doesn't recognize MACE as someone they were working with last year? Or what about Mia Yim? Her fiancée Keith Lee was on RAW. He doesn't recognize her? She's the only blue-haired Asian woman in the company. Fifth, if they're part of the WWE system like they said, then they were already under contract. Why did they sign another contract? And sixth, why would WWE give contracts to people whose sole goal is to destroy WWE and have already spent months causing havoc and property damage. Nothing about this was good or logical.
Needless to say, RETRIBUTION was absolutely dead on arrival. Backstage reports came out that the group's debut was met with laughter at times, and that the masks and names made the road for the talent "impossible to climb." Someone else who realized that; Mercedes Martinez, who actually asked to be removed from the group just over a month after the reveal. That's right, the group was so bad that one of its members bailed on a main roster run to go back to NXT. Things looked up a bit when Mustafa Ali was revealed as the leader of the group. Unfortunately, instead of Ali elevating the group because he's great, the group dragged him down into the muck. It wasn't long before RETRIBUTION was nothing more than an afterthought, eventually disbanding at Fastlane this year. In total, RETRIBUTION had two pay-per-view matches. One at Hell in a Cell when Bobby Ashley Lashley squashed SLAPJACK to retain his United States Championship, and one on the Fastlane pre-show where Ali lost to Matt Riddle in another United States Championship match. They had zero matches as a team on pay-per-view and posted an abysmal 2-7 record as a team on TV. To put in perspective how much of a joke RETRIBUTION was right away, the Shield didn't get pinned or submitted on TV or pay-per-view until their 19th match as a team, after getting a decisive win in 16 of their first 18 matches. RETRIBUTION was pinned or submitted in their 2nd match, which came after they lost their first match by DQ. They didn't even win a match until the November 11th episode of RAW, nearly two months after their debut. Out of the 9 matches, RETRIBUTION had as a team, the worst of the bunch was their 3rd match, a 4 vs 4 elimination tag match on the October 26th episode of RAW pitting the male members of the group against the Hurt Business, consisting of Bobby Lashley, MVP, Shelton Benjamin, and Cedric Alexander that holds a 1.57 rating on Cagematch.net. These two teams are basically polar opposites in terms of fan reception. One was a universally hated group people couldn't wait to see break up, while the other was a beloved stable nobody wanted to see split. Let's get into this.
The Hurt Business is out first and cut a promo. MVP says the Hurt Business were the only ones who didn't run from RETRIBUTION while Lashley says that RAW is an asset of the Hurt Business, while RETRIBUTION is a liability. MVP says he's struck a deal with the higher-ups to take the fight to RETRIBUTION, and in exchange, Shelton Benjamin says they want gold as their payment. Outcomes RETRIBUTION, twitching around in their goofy masks as they make their entrance.God, they are such geeks. I really don't want to tear these guys down to much because I know how talented Ali, Dijakovic, Thorne, and Yim are (and Dio Maddin's awesome for slipping in OSW Review references on RAW), but man, they just look like the biggest losers. Shane Thorne legitimately looks like a backyard wrestler as SLAPJACK.
Lashley and T-BAR start with Lashley getting the better of a lock-up and forcing T-BAR into the corner. Lashley beats on T-BAR, taking him to the opposite corner and continuing to lay in until T-BAR catches him with a big boot. T-BAR goes on the offensive, clubbing away at Lashley until Lashley floors him with a shoulder block. T-BAR recovers quickly and the two go back and forth before Lashley hits a flatliner. MVP tags in and beats down T-BAR, but T-BAR fights back with a knee to the gut and a club to the back. MACE tags in and clubs away at MVP before tagging in SLAPJACK. SLAPJACK hits a snapmare followed by a dropkick for a one count before beating down MVP in the corner. MVP counters a charge by tossing SLAPJACK into the middle turnbuckle and hits a big boot in the corner followed by an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. MVP makes the cover, but Ali breaks up the fall and quickly leaves the ring. This prompts RECKONING to hop up on the apron and do...this.
Apparently, Vince McMahon wanted her to pretend to have a seizure, but after Mia Yim and others expressed how poor taste that would be (correctly, I might add), it was changed to whatever that was. Just when you think the booking of RETRIBUTION can't get worse. Also, the referee repeatedly calls RECKONING "Mia" during this, which was apparently the only thing Vince didn't like about this. What a bizarre human being. Naturally, this "seizure", or "possession" as RECKONING tried to play it off as in a now-deleted tweet, is enough of a distraction to allow SLAPJACK to roll up MVP and eliminate him. RECKONING continues to writhe on the ground as RAW goes into a commercial break.
When RAW comes back, Lashley is working over SLAPJACK with a waistlock. We also see in a picture-in-picture that RECKONING was faking...whatever that was, and is promptly ejected from ringside. Lashley tosses SLAPJACK into the corner, and despite SLAPJACK getting some offense in by getting his boot up, Lashley blocks a jumping DDT attempt and hits the Spear for the elimination. T-BAR quickly pounces on Lashley, but is just as quickly tossed out of the ring. T-BAR manages to drag Lashley out of the ring, where the two brawl over the barricade and get counted out. MACE and Alexander enter the ring, with MACE getting the better of the exchange with a leg lariat. MACE beats down Alexander in the corner, preventing him from tagging out until Alexander blocks a chokeslam and boots MACE away, allowing Benjamin to make the blind tag. Alexander hits a jumping enziguri before Benjamin hits the Paydirt, a leaping reverse STO, to eliminate MACE.
Benjamin takes the fight to Ali, hitting a big fallaway slam before tagging Alexander back in. Ali turns the tables for a bit by dropkicking Benjamin off the apron when Alexander whips him into the Hurt Business' corner, but Alexander quickly regains control with a huge back body drop. Alexander boots Ali out of the ring, but Ali catches him with a steel chair when he follows him out, getting himself DQ'd and giving the win to the Hurt Business. Benjamin and a returning MVP & Lashley chase Ali, who hops the barricade and runs to the back.
The Verdict
What a bunch of terrible booking. Granted, the in-ring action isn't bad (how could it be with guys in this match) but everything else was bad. The random seizure spot put a bad taste in my mouth, and the DQ finish was just cheap. But most importantly, nobody gained anything from this match. RETRIBUTION were winless as a team, firmly establishing themselves as barely a threat, which also means that the Hurt Business gained nothing by getting the better of them in a match. This was just a waste of time.
The Rankings (Best to Worst)
- Rick Rude vs Jake Roberts-WrestleMania IV
- Too Much vs Al Snow & Head-King of the Ring 1998
- Brock Lesnar vs Roman Reigns-Greatest Royal Rumble
- Ernest Miller vs Norman Smiley-Fall Brawl 1998
- Shane McMahon vs Eric Bischoff-SummerSlam 2003
- The Tag Team Gauntlet-Extreme Rules 2010
- Randy Orton vs Bray Wyatt-WrestleMania 33
- Vampiro vs Sting-Great American Bash 2000
- T&A vs Head Cheese-WrestleMania 2000
- The Women's Tag Team Turmoil-WrestleMania 37 (Night 1)
- Triple H vs Sgt. Slaughter-D-Generation X: In Your House
- Konnan vs One Man Gang-SuperBrawl VI
- Ultimate Warrior vs Hercules-WrestleMania IV
- Rick Rude vs Hawk-Clash of the Champions XXV
- Shelton Benjamin vs Viscera-New Year's Revolution 2006
- Steve McMichael vs Reggie White-Slamboree 1997
- Lars Sullivan vs Lucha House Party-Super Showdown 2019
- Alexa Bliss vs Bayley-Extreme Rules 2017
- The Tag Team Fatal 4-Way Match-WrestleMania 13
- Tag Team Battle Royal-WrestleMania XIV
- The Chamber of Horrors-Halloween Havoc 1991
- The Natural Disasters vs Money Inc.-WrestleMania VIII
- Ivan Koloff vs Paul Jones-Clash of the Champions IV
- ODB, Taylor Wilde, and Roxxi vs The Kongtourage-Genesis 2009
- Kazushi Sakuraba & Yuji Nagata vs Daniel & Rolles Gracie-Wrestle Kingdom 8
- Ivory vs Tori-SummerSlam 1999
- Giant Baba vs Bulldog Bob Brown-WrestleRock
- The Reverse Battle Royal-Impact! (10/26/2006)
- Jerry Blackwell vs Boris Zhukov-SuperClash II
- Nikita Koloff vs Bobby Eaton-Bunkhouse Stampede
- Alex Wright vs Steve McMichael-Halloween Havoc 1997
- The Great Khali vs Kane-WrestleMania 23
- Savio Vega vs Crush vs Faarooq-Ground Zero: In Your House
- The Shockmaster vs Awesome/King Kong-Starrcade 1993
- Total Divas vs Other Divas-Survivor Series 2013
- The Oddities vs Kaientai-SummerSlam 1998
- Hulk Hogan vs Sid Justice-WrestleMania VIII
- Paul Ellering vs Teddy Long-Capital Combat
- Dusty Rhodes vs Big Boss Man-Saturday Night's Main Event (10/31/1989)
- Konnan vs Scott Hall-Fall Brawl 1998
- Damian Priest vs The Miz-WrestleMania Backlash
- Tyson Tomko vs Stevie Richards-Unforgiven 2004
- Kane vs The Great Khali-SummerSlam 2009
- Rick Steiner vs Scott Steiner-Fall Brawl 1998
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Hog Wild
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Souled Out 1997
- Dustin Rhodes & King Kong vs Awesome Kong & The Equalizer-Battlebowl
- Finlay & Little Bastard vs The Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman-No Way Out 2007
- Jake Roberts vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania V
- El Gigante vs Nailz-G1 Climax 1994 (Day 1)
- Yokozuna vs King Mabel-In Your House 4
- Dusty Rhodes vs The Honky Tonk Man-SummerSlam 1989
- Sting & Hawk vs Meng & Kurasawa-Clash of the Champions XXXI
- The Hurt Business vs RETRIBUTION-WWE Monday Night RAW (10/26/2020)
- Hulk Hogan vs Randy Savage-Uncensored 1998
- Al Snow vs Big Boss Man-Unforgiven 1999
- Mickie James vs Ashley-Royal Rumble 2006
- Antonio Inoki vs The Great Antonio-NJPW Sumo Hall Show (12/8/1977)
- Christy Hemme vs Big Fat Oily Guy-Against All Odds 2007
- British Bulldog & Jim Neidhart vs The Dancing Fools-Fall Brawl 1998
- Stevie Ray vs Konnan-World War 3 1998
- Vampiro vs The KISS Demon-Bash at the Beach 2000
- Team WCW vs nWo Wolfpac vs nWo Hollywood-Fall Brawl 1998
- Vampiro vs Oklahoma-Starrcade 1999
- Big Swole vs Penelope Ford, Rebel, and Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D.-AEW Dynamite (8/27/2020)
- Hulk Hogan vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania III
- Jinder Mahal vs Randy Orton-Battleground 2017
- Van Hammer vs Terrance Taylor-Clash of the Champions XVI
- Junkyard Dog vs Moondog Spot-Wrestling Classic
- Chris Jericho vs "Goldberg"-Fall Brawl 1998
- Roman Reigns vs The Undertaker-WrestleMania 33
- The Undertaker vs Goldberg-Super ShowDown 2019
- Hiroshi Wajima vs Tom Magee-All Japan Pro Wrestling 1988
- Jim Duggan vs Big Boss Man-Royal Rumble 1990
- Meng vs Jim Duggan-Uncensored 1995
- Jim Steele vs The Equalizer-SuperBrawl IV
- The Undertaker vs Giant González-WrestleMania IX
- Sting vs Tony Palmore-Battle 7
- D-Generation X vs Brothers of Destruction-Crown Jewel
- Wendi Richter vs Leilani Kai-WrestleMania
- Goldberg vs Brock Lesnar-WrestleMania XX
- Edge vs Triple H vs Vladimir Kozlov-Survivor Series 2008
- Kevin Sullivan vs Dave Sullivan-SuperBrawl V
- Steve McMichael vs Brian Adams-Road Wild 1998
- Scott Hall vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl IX
- Boris Zhukov vs Paul Samson-Beach Brawl
- Roddy Piper vs Hollywood Hogan-Halloween Havoc 1997
- Kane vs The Great Khali-Breaking Point
- Hollywood Hogan & Dennis Rodman vs Diamond Dallas Page & Karl Malone-Bash at the Beach 1998
- PN News & Bobby Eaton vs Steve Austin & Terrance Taylor-Great American Bash 1991
- Scott Steiner vs Sid Vicious vs Jeff Jarrett vs Road Warrior Animal-Sin
- Hollywood Hogan vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl 1997
- Batista vs The Great Khali-SummerSlam 2007
- Sting vs Hollywood Hogan-Starrcade 1997
- Sable vs Tori-WrestleMania XV
- Super Invader vs Todd Champion-WrestleWar 1992
- Brock Lesnar vs Cain Velasquez-Crown Jewel 2019
- King Kong Bundy & Jim Neidhart vs Yokozuna & Jake Roberts-Heroes of Wrestling
- Sid Vicious vs The Nightstalker-Clash of the Champions XIII
- The 8-Divas Tag Match-Survivor Series 1999
- The Fabulous Freebirds vs The Renegade Warriors-Halloween Havoc 1990
- The Knockouts Gauntlet-One Night Only: Live! 2016
- AJ Styles vs Frank Trigg-No Surrender 2008
- Rick Rude vs Masahiro Chono-Halloween Havoc 1992
- Mike Awesome vs Vampiro-Halloween Havoc 2000
- Bray Wyatt vs John Cena-Extreme Rules 2014
- Brothers of Destruction vs KroniK-Unforgiven 2001
- The Miss WrestleMania Battle Royal-WrestleMania 25
- Mabel vs The Undertaker-King of the Ring 1995
- Wendi Richter vs The Fabulous Moolah-The Brawl to End it All
- David Flair vs Kimberly Page-Mayhem 1999
- The Truth Commission vs The Disciples of Apocolypse-Survivor Series 1997
- Daffney vs Miss Hancock-Bash at the Beach 2000
- The Bushwhacker vs The Fabulous Rougeaus-WrestleMania V
- Randy Orton vs "The Fiend" Bray Wyatt-WrestleMania 37 (Night 2)
- The Beverly Brothers vs The Bushwhackers-Royal Rumble 1992
- Teddy Long vs Eric Bischoff-Survivor Series 2005
- Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling
- Abdullah the Butcher vs One Man Gang-Heroes of Wrestling
- Major Gunns vs Miss Hancock-New Blood Rising
- Bradshaw & Trish Stratus vs Christopher Nowinski & Jackie Gayda-WWE Monday Night RAW (7/8/2002)
- Triple H vs Scott Steiner-Royal Rumble 2003
- Goldberg vs "The Fiend" Bray Wyatt-Super ShowDown 2020
- Santina Marella vs Vickie & Chavo Guerrero-Extreme Rules 2009
- Kevin Nash vs Scott Steiner vs Goldberg-New Blood Rising
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Warrior-Halloween Havoc 1998
- Mr. T vs Roddy Piper-WrestleMania 2
- The Royal Family vs Clowns R' Us-Survivor Series 1994
- The House of Horrors Match-Payback 2017
- The Blacktop Bully vs Dustin Rhodes-Uncensored 1995
- Team Dos Caras vs Team El Canek-Leyendas Mexicanas 2017
- Pat Patterson vs Gerald Brisco-King of the Ring 2000
- The Wyatt Swamp Fight-The Horror Show at Extreme Rules
- The Four Doinks vs Team Bigelow-Survivor Series 1993
- Sting vs Jeff Hardy-Victory Road 2011
- Bret Hart vs Mr. McMahon-WrestleMania XVI
- Oz vs Tim Parker-SuperBrawl
- Brock Lesnar vs Braun Strowman-Crown Jewel 2018
- Brock Lesnar vs Ricochet-Super ShowDown 2020
- The Mighty Maccabee vs The Iron Sheik-Maccabiah Mania II: Shekel Slam
- Van Hammer vs Doug Somers-Halloween Havoc 1991
- Ultimate Warrior vs Andre the Giant-Saturday Night's Main Event (11/25/1989)
- Jeff Jarrett vs Sting-Halloween Havoc 2000
- The Doomsday Cage Match-Uncensored 1996
- Kane vs The Undertaker-Judgement Day 1998
- Rebel vs Shelly Martinez-One Night Only: Knockouts Knockdown
- Kaitlyn vs Maxine-NXT (10/19/2010)
- Sabu vs The Sandman-November to Remember 1997
- Seth Rollins vs "The Fiend" Bray Wyatt-Hell in a Cell 2019
- Michael Cole vs Jerry Lawler-WrestleMania XXVII
- The Bushwhackers vs Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff-Heroes of Wrestling
- James Storm vs Chris Harris-Lockdown 2007
- John Laurinaitis vs John Cena-Over the Limit 2012
- Hulk Hogan vs The Giant-Halloween Havoc 1995
- Ultimate Warrior vs Goldust-In Your House 7
- Los Villanos vs Los Psycho Circus-Triplemania XXIII
- Jenna Morasca vs Sharmell-Victory Road 2009
Thanks for reading! Be sure to share if you enjoy and leave any suggestions for matches you'd like to see covered in the Worst in the World in the comments. Next time I'll be taking a look at the main event of Survivor Series 2017, a match that could've showcased the future of WWE, but ended up pushing them aside for the older talent. So...the perfect representation of WWE, I guess.
Frost here, got another one for you. So, you know how bad the 1998 Fall Brawl War Games match was? Well, it might not even be the worst "War Games" match WCW ever produced: September 4, 2000. Nitro in Dallas, Texas. It was BAD.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the suggestion! I've never actually seen that match but I've heard it's an absolute mess and probably more than deserving of a spot in the series
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