Back to TNA we go. Everytime I see someone online say that the Knockouts are better than the women in WWE, all I can really think is...what show have you been watching? With the exception of a select few (Gail Kim, early Awesome Kong, Taryn Terrell. etc.), I would gladly take just about any woman on WWE's roster over a TNA Knockout. In this match, we get 6 of the most interchangeable woman TNA had on its roster in 2009 and puts them in a 6 Knockout Tag Match. It's the teams of ODB, Roxxi, and Taylor Wilde against Awesome Kong's Kongtourage, Rhaka Khan, Raisha Saeed (Cheerleader Melissa under a veil), and Sojournor Bolt. It's TNA, it's the Knockouts, and Rhaka Khan, so that should set your expectations right there. Let's get into this.
The match kicks off with Taylor Wilde going to work on Sojo Bolt with a lot of nice, quick offense. Saeed & Roxxi tag in, and Roxxi dominates her with forearms and a submission hold before tagging in ODB. Saeed is able to tag in Rhaka Khan, and ODB responds to this by grabbing's Khan's boobs (?). So despite Khan tagging in supposedly being a big deal, she is immedatley dominated by ODB, who makes the tag to Wilde. Saeed distracts the referee, which allows the Kongtourage to take control and beat down Wilde at ringside.
Saeed beats down Wilde for a bit, making me realize this match would be so much better if it was just Taylor Wilde vs Raisha Saeed. Sojo tags in (dammit) and hits a second rope elbow drop for a two count. Don West on commentary says that Wilde is getting a three on one beatdown "and not in a good way." What the f*ck does he mean "in a good way". When is getting beat down three on one ever a good thing?
Wilde and Sojo do a double hair pull whip, which allows Wilde to make the tag to ODB. ODB runs wild on the Kongtourage, bodyslamming Sojo and Saeed, but can't manage to slam Khan, so instead goes for a fallaway slam. ODB hits a running powerslam on Saeed and makes the pin, but Sojo breaks it up by running past ODB without making contact. What, did the wind break up the pin? Chaos ensues as everyone brawls in the ring. Roxxi takes Sojo and Khan to the outside, the three fall over and get back up, which allows Wilde to hit a top rope dive to the outside. Jesus Christ, Taylor Wilde is awesome. ODB rolls up Saeed in the ring for the win.
The Verdict
Well...that was a match. There were parts that were pretty good, specifically super-worker Taylor Wilde, but nothing else was really that noteworthy. There was only one real botch (the outside stumble), and the action wasn't terrible. It was just kind of...a match.
Rankings (Best to Worst)
- Too Much vs Al Snow & Head-King of the Ring 1998
- Vampiro vs Sting-Great American Bash 2000
- T&A vs Head Cheese-WrestleMania 2000
- Konnan vs One Man Gang-SuperBrawl VI
- Ultimate Warrior vs Hercules-WrestleMania IV
- Rick Rude vs Hawk-Clash of the Champions XXV
- Shelton Benjamin vs Viscera-New Year's Revolution 2006
- The Chamber of Horrors-Halloween Havoc 1991
- The Natural Disasters vs Money Inc.-WrestleMania VIII
- ODB, Taylor Wilde, and Roxxi vs The Kongtourage-Genesis 2009
- Nikita Koloff vs Bobby Eaton-Bunkhouse Stampede
- Total Divas vs Other Divas-Survivor Series 2013
- The Oddities vs Kaientai-SummerSlam 1998
- Hulk Hogan vs Sid Justice-WrestleMania VIII
- Dusty Rhodes vs Big Boss Man-Saturday Night's Main Event (10/31/1989)
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Hog Wild
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Souled Out 1997
- Dustin Rhodes & King Kong vs Awesome Kong & The Equalizer-Battlebowl
- Jake Roberts vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania V
- Sting & Hawk vs Meng & Kurasawa-Clash of the Champions XXXI
- Hulk Hogan vs Randy Savage-Uncensored 1998
- Al Snow vs Big Boss Man-Unforgiven 1999
- Mickie James vs Ashley-Royal Rumble 2006
- Christy Hemme vs Big Fat Oily Guy-Against All Odds 2007
- Team WCW vs nWo Wolfpac vs nWo Hollywood-Fall Brawl 1998
- Vampiro vs Oklahoma-Starrcade 1999
- Hulk Hogan vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania III
- Junkyard Dog vs Moondog Spot-Wrestling Classic
- Hiroshi Wajima vs Tom Magee-All Japan Pro Wrestling 1988
- Jim Steele vs The Equalizer-SuperBrawl IV
- Edge vs Triple H vs Vladimir Kozlov-Survivor Series 2008
- Kevin Sullivan vs Dave Sullivan-SuperBrawl V
- Steve McMichael vs Brian Adams-Road Wild 1998
- Scott Steiner vs Sid Vicious vs Jeff Jarrett vs Road Warrior Animal-Sin
- Hollywood Hogan vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl 1997
- Batista vs The Great Khali-SummerSlam 2007
- Sable vs Tori-WrestleMania XV
- Sid Vicious vs The Nightstalker-Clash of the Champions XIII
- The 8-Divas Tag Match-Survivor Series 1999
- Rick Rude vs Masahiro Chono-Halloween Havoc 1992
- Mike Awesome vs Vampiro-Halloween Havoc 2000
- Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling
- Abdullah the Butcher vs One Man Gang-Heroes of Wrestling
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Warrior-Halloween Havoc 1998
- The Royal Family vs Clowns R' Us-Survivor Series 1994
- Sting vs Jeff Hardy-Victory Road 2011
- Ultimate Warrior vs Andre the Giant-Saturday Night's Main Event (11/25/1989)
- The Doomsday Cage Match-Uncensored 1996
- Kaitlyn vs Maxine-NXT (10/19/10)
- Sabu vs The Sandman-November to Remember 1997
- James Storm vs Chris Harris-Lockdown 2007
- John Laurinaitis vs John Cena-Over the Limit 2012
- Los Villanos vs Los Psycho Circus-Triplemania XXIII
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