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Worst in the World: Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling

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I take back every bad word I've said about WCW, because I don't think they've ever put on a show as bad as Heroes of Wrestling. I'm not even joking, this might be the worst pay-per-view of all time. It's so bad, that four of the matches on the card are on the 100 Worst Rated matches on the Internet Wrestling Database. That's half the card! The only bright side of this is that after this, there are only three left to review.
First, let me just explain what Heroes of Wrestling was (according to Wikipedia). Bill Stone, the president of Fosstone Productions, had an idea to have a series of wrestling shows featuring some of the biggest stars of the 80s and early 90s. A show featuring the likes of 2 Cold Scorpio, Jake Roberts, and The Iron Sheik; sounds like a great show in say, 1993. The problem, this event was in 1999. By this point, all the stars were passed their prime and some could barely work. Every single match on the card was panned by critics and fans, with the highest rated match being 2 Cold Scorpio facing Julio Fantastico, and that only got one and one-fourth stars (probably because they were both reasonably young at the time). Only two matches even got anything higher than zero stars, and the show includes one of the only five minus five stars matches. Along with a commentator who was completely clueless and Jake Roberts just completely intoxicated during his match, it has gone down in infamy in the professional wrestling world. The other events were cancelled, so this is the only Heroes of Wrestling show in history. It features four of the worst matches of all time, and Greg Valentine vs George Steele is one of them.
First off, just wanted to give a quick little note about how Greg Valentine's hair has not changed at all since 1999:
Left: Greg Valentine at Heroes of Wrestling in 1999. Right: Greg Valentine in 2015
 Amazing. Too bad he sucks. His gimmick is being a fat Ric Flair, and I'm not even stretching for that comparison, either. He comes out in a fancy robe, has long blonde hair, does the Flair flop after he gets punched, and even does the figure-four leglock. It's like if you combined Ric Flair and the guy from Super Size Me. Valentine cuts a pre-match promo saying George Steele is going to lay down and die, and then he's going to put him in the figure four. That's a weird order of things to do. Steele comes out with Sherri Martel. The match starts and Valentine immediately rolls out of the ring. He get's back in and Steele bites his arm. After he let's go, there is a whole minute where not a single move or punch is even attempted. They don't even touch each other, it's just stalling.
The ref eventually gives Steele grief about wearing a shirt (good thing Kevin Owens didn't wrestle in the 90s), and Valentine attacks Steele while he tries to take the shirt off. So Valentine gets the heat because Steele literally can't get his shirt off. I'm not kidding, it takes Steele a minute and a half just to take his shirt off. F**k off! During that minute, Martel does a Vince Russo special and starts attacking a blinded Steele. It's a SWERVE! The commentators start saying Steele can't tell it's Martel. Who else could it be? The only other people there are Valentine and the ref, and the ref literally pulled Valentine off of Steele like 3 seconds ago. Steele finally gets his shirt off and hits Valentine with a object (can't tell what it was, and neither can the commentators) because "babyface", and Martel hides it in her cleavage. This camera guy knows whats up.
They go back to plodding offense, and Steele low blows Valentine. How is Steele a face? That's the second time Steele has done something that should have gotten him disqualified. It was in plain view of the referee too. F**k off. So Martel gives Valentine the object, he hits Steele with it, and hides it in the back of his trunks. You let me down, camera guy. It falls out, and the referee ignores it. Martel hits Steele in the back of the head with a chair, and Valentine wins. Steele cleans house, throws some chairs in the ring, and eats a turnbuckle pad. Valentine comes back and hits him with a chair and no sells. So he takes one chair shot, and he loses the match. He takes another, and it doesn't affect him at all. I know the first one was to the head, but he doesn't even flinch on the second one. Like I've said before...F**k off.
This was barely a match. No one did an actual wrestling moves in this match. No wonder this match is on the bottom 100 list. This is just a nothing match that should have never happened.

The Verdict

This was definitely one of the worst matches I've seen since doing this. It's not "the worst", but it is very close.

Rankings (Best to Worst)

  1. Konnan vs One Man Gang-SuperBrawl VI
  2. The Chamber of Horrors-Halloween Havoc 1991
  3. Nikita Koloff vs Bobby Eaton-Bunkhouse Stampede
  4. The Oddities vs Kaientai-SummerSlam 1998
  5. Hulk Hogan vs Sid Justice-WrestleMania VIII
  6. Kevin Sullivan vs Dave Sullivan-SuperBrawl V
  7. Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling
  8. Hollywood Hogan vs The Warrior-Halloween Havoc 1998
  9. The Doomsday Cage Match-Uncensored 1996
 So, up next for the Worst in the World is...
Great...it's Brie Mode time, everybody.
Thanks for reading.




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