If there was an image to sum up Season 3 of NXT, it would be this:
Back before NXT was the best wrestling product in the world, it was a terrible faux-reality type show where wrestlers from Florida Championship Wrestling competed for a spot on the main roster. It sucked, and Season 3 was arguably the worst season. Considering how only one of the competitors had wrestling experience prior to WWE (AJ), the wrestling was sub par, and took a backseat to competitions. And the worst of the bunch was a dreadful match between Kaitlyn and Maxine. Taking place on October 19th, 2010, it's pretty clear that these two needed a lot of work if they were going to be on the main roster. Like...A LOT of work.
So the match hasn't even started yet, and there's already four things wrong with this match.
1. Maxine looks absolutely terrified to be wrestling right now:
That's not good
2. Kaitlyn is wrestling in a hoodie:
Why? Do you really care?
3. Someone thought it was a good idea to give Vickie Guerrero (the person with the most annoying voice in the history of WWE) a live mic so she can shriek for the entire match and everyone can hear it clear as day. It was probably the same person who made Kaitlyn wrestle in a hoodie
4. Heel Michael Cole and Josh Matthews are doing commentary. God help us all.
The two lock up, and after shoving Maxine off, Kaitlyn hits the worst belly to back suplex I've ever seen. This is what the whole match is like. Kaitlyn charges at Maxine in the corner, who barely puts her foot up and Kaitlyn crumples when she hit it. Cole and Matthews have given up at this point and just sh*t on everything in this match. The wrestling, Vickie, Alicia Fox. I can't really blame them. Maxine hits a terrible clothesline, and Kaitlyn kicks out at one. Cole flat out calls this "the worst segment of this show" that he's ever been a part of. I bet he'd rather be backstage with Heidenreich instead of watching this.
Maxine hits a few terrible shoulder thrusts into the corner, and does a hair whip(?) which Kaitlyn sells horribly. Maxine starts using Kaitlyn's sweatshirt as a weapon, which prompts Vickie to complain. Thanks Maxine...f*ck you. Also, Alicia Fox's advice in this match is basically "hit her again" and "stand up". Just dreadful.
Maxine goes for a snapmare, which Kaitlyn botches the selling of, and Michael Cole literally leaves the commentary table to take a phone call. I wish I was kidding:
This transcends not giving a f*ck. This is like just purely giving up on life. This match broke Michael Cole. At one point, he gives the phone to Tony Chimel, which actually made me laugh. Oh, wait, there's a match going on, isn't there.
So after an endless headlock by Maxine, Kaitlyn fights back, hits the first decent move of the match, a sidewalk slam, and covers for a two. After falling during a clothesline, Kaitlyn hits the single worst atomic drop ever, which Kaitlyn redoes and hits a slightly better but still sh*t atomic drop. Kaitlyn does a terrible roll up for a two, and Maxine follows up with her own terrible roll up. Kaitlyn rolls to far back, so she has to roll forward, and Maxine pins her with the very rare "hold her down by the vagina" pin:
Maxine gets the win:
The Verdict
That was the longest six minutes of my life. I don't think I've ever seen a match where everything done is done wrong. Aside from the one sidewalk slam, everything single move is botched in some way. Both of them managed to f*ck up a roll up. HOW?! This is definitely going at the bottom of the list.
Rankings (Best to Worst)
- Too Much vs Al Snow & Head-King of the Ring 1998
- Vampiro vs Sting-Great American Bash 2000
- Konnan vs One Man Gang-SuperBrawl VI
- Ultimate Warrior vs Hercules-WrestleMania IV
- The Chamber of Horrors-Halloween Havoc 1991
- Nikita Koloff vs Bobby Eaton-Bunkhouse Stampede
- Total Divas vs Other Divas-Survivor Series 2013
- The Oddities vs Kaientai-SummerSlam 1998
- Hulk Hogan vs Sid Justice-WrestleMania VIII
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Hog Wild
- Jake Roberts vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania V
- Al Snow vs Big Boss Man-Unforgiven 1999
- Christy Hemme vs Big Fat Oily Guy-Against All Odds 2007
- Vampiro vs Oklahoma-Starrcade 1999
- Junkyard Dog vs Moondog Spot-Wrestling Classic
- Hiroshi Wajima vs Tom Magee-All Japan Pro Wrestling 1988
- Kevin Sullivan vs Dave Sullivan-SuperBrawl V
- Steve McMichael vs Brian Adams-Road Wild 1998
- Scott Steiner vs Sid Vicious vs Jeff Jarrett vs Road Warrior Animal-Sin
- Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling
- Hollywood Hogan vs The Warrior-Halloween Havoc 1998
- The Royal Family vs Clowns R' Us-Survivor Series 1994
- Sting vs Jeff Hardy-Victory Road 2011
- Ultimate Warrior vs Andre the Giant-Saturday Night's Main Event (11/25/1989)
- The Doomsday Cage Match-Uncensored 1996
- Kaitlyn vs Maxine-NXT (10/19/10)
- James Storm vs Chris Harris-Lockdown 2007
- John Laurinaitis vs John Cena-Over the Limit 2012
And up next is...
Oh great, Sable...
Thanks for reading. Be sure to share if you enjoyed.
I came here for the Villanos/Psycho Circus review, but when I saw this was on the list I had to find it. My favourite thing about this match is Kaitlyn eye-rolling after the finish; can't say I blame her.
ReplyDeleteOh, second place:
DeleteCole comes back to the booth after finishing his call. "What did I miss?"
Matthews: "Nothing!"
Between how bad the match was and how the commentators reacted to it all, one has to wonder if they intentionally made the match this bad. Is that a possibility? Would they actually willingly put on a match, almost for the sake of comedy, that was absolutely terrible?
ReplyDeleteIt's entirely possible, but I'd chalk it up more to inexperience from the wrestlers than anything. Like, Kaitlyn had only been wrestling for three months, and Maxine wasn't much more experienced here.
Delete