The Wrestling Section

Pre-Show Match #1: The Lucha Dragons vs The Dudley Boyz Winners: The Lucha Dragons Leave it to WWE to book not one, but two Kick-Off matches two days before the pay-per-view. And better yet, one with zero build up! Woohoo! This match pits the Lucha Dragons against the Dudley Boyz. Since the Dudleyz are jobbers at this point, I'm going with the Lucha Dragons for the win. Match #2: The Golden Truth vs Breezango Winners: The Golden Truth After the LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG build up to the Golden Truth coming together, they finally are...and losing a lot. What was the point? Anyway, they face their equally directionless and poorly named Breezango. It's a pointless match. I'm going with Golden Truth. Main Card Match #1: Apollo Crew vs Sheamus Winner: Apollo Crews In what I'm hoping will help him get over big with the fans, Apollo Crews faces off with Sheamus. This is exactly what Crews needs in my opinion, a good opponent who ...

Authors of Pain vs "Local Competitors"- We kick off the show with the Authors of Pain (aka The Ascension, but 1000 times cooler) destroying two jobbers in quick fashion. You can tell it's going to be over very soon when one of the teams is straight up called "Local Competitors". One of the Authors throws one of the jobbers into his teams corner, inadvertently making him make the tag. The Authors don't have names yet, so Tom Phillips calls one of them "the tattooed one". At one point, one of them pulls one of jobbers over the top rope and basically makes him hit a Swanton Bomb on his teammate. They hit the big boot/sidewalk slam on one guy and finish the other with the Russian leg sweep/lariat combo for the win. Hey, anybody who beats people up using other people is awesome in my book. Backstage, Andrade "Cien" Almas gets interviewed by Cathy Kelley. Before the interview really starts, Tye Dillinger interrupts and says Almas' win...

Welp...Mabel's back. It's been a while since the 500 pounder found his way onto the Worst in the World, but he's back and ready to be awful still. This time he goes up against the Undertaker, who is a lot better when he's facing smaller guys like Shawn Michaels, Jeff Hardy, or Kurt Angle, and not giants who can't really work too well like Giant Gonzales, Mark Henry, and...well. Mabel. They square off in a first round match up in the 1995 King of the Ring tournament. If your a WWE history buff like me, you probably already know who wins this infamous King of the Ring tournament, and therefore the match. If you aren't, well...be prepared. The match kicks off with Undertaker attempting to knock Mabel off his feet...and he succeeds. Kind of kills the importance of the "giant can't be knocked off his feet" spot if you do it within the first minute of the match. It would be like if Hulk Hogan bodyslammed Andre the Giant on the first attempt at Wrestl...

IT'S A NEW DAY, YES IT IS! We kick of the show with the New Day. They talk about the Fatal 4-Way Tag Team Championship match before Xavier & Big E insults Kofi's new Steph Curry 2s (I can't blame them). They are interrupted by Enzo & Cass, who say they're cool with everything the New Day does and calls their unicorn horn vibrators. before Cass throws more shade at Kofi's shoes...good. Cass then basically implies that Enzo f*cked Francessca the trombone. That is not a joke. I guess Xavier admits he also f*cks the trombone. This talk of trombone f*cking brings out the Vaudevillians (I guess). English sings about how he and Gotch will win the Tag Team Championships at Money in the Bank. This brings out Gallows & Anderson, and Gallows drops a New Orleans Saints diss because that's not at all topical at the moment. Cass calls them S-A-W-F-T SAWFT! and that ends the segment. Seriously though, look at these shoes!: I know it's an old joke bu...

If there's anyone who got shafted harder during the Attitude Era than everyone else, it was probably Ivory. Despite being an actual trained wrestler with over a decade of wrestling experience under her belt before joining the WWF, she was pushed aside for the women like Sable and Miss Kitty because they were hot. She may have been a three time Women's Champion, but each of those reigns was treated as a joke and ended as a joke, with her competing in bogus hardcore matches, getting squashed at WrestleMania, and even taking clean pinfall loses to a 76-year old Fabulous Moolah , all while champion. Here, she defends her Women's Championship against Tori at SummerSlam 1999. Both are at least average workers, how could this go bad? Tori sprints to the ring and match immediately starts, with Tori hitting a powerslam and Ivory rolling out of the ring. Ivory pulls Tori out of the ring under the bottom rope and does the most overly-emphatic eye rack ever before pushing Tori int...

Well, another NXT Takeover is in the books (in the pocket, out of sight) and as always, it didn't disappoint. The Takeover shows are always great and frequently have some Match of the Year candidates. Here are my thoughts on the show. Dark Match: Ember Moon def. Peyton Royce If you never seen any of Ember Moon. formerly known as Athena, on the independent scene, I heavily recommend checking out some of her matches. She was one of the best female wrestlers on the indys and I think she could fill the top babyface spot when Bayley & Asuka eventually go up to the main roster. Andrade "Cien" Almas def. Tye Dillinger In his debut on NXT TV, Andrade "Cien" Almas, the former La Sombra, defeated The Perfect 10 Tye Dillinger in rather quick fashion (5:22) with a double knee smash in the corner. Now personally, I think they made the wrong choice having Almas debut against Dillinger. Not because he's bad, but because Dillinger is so over with the crowd ...

Match #1: Andrade "Cien" Almas vs Tye Dillinger Winner: Andrade "Cien" Almas It's finally time for the former La Sombra to debut in NXT. The former IWGP Intercontinental Champion will make his debut against the Perfect 10 Tye Dillinger, who has basically become the punching bag for debuting wrestlers, replacing CJ Parker. Since there's so much hype around him, I fully expect a win for Almas. Match #2: American Alpha (c) vs The Revival-NXT Tag Team Championships Winners: American Alpha In a rematch from Takeover: Dallas, American Alpha defend the NXT Tag Team Championships against the former champions The Revival. Since wrestlers almost never win titles twice, I'm going with American Alpha to win and retain the titles. Match #3: Asuka (c) vs Nia Jax-NXT Women's Championship Winner: Asuka In a match pitting two of NXT's most unstoppable women (unless you're Bayley for one of them), Asuka defends her title against Nia Jax. T...