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Worst in the World: Steve McMichael vs Reggie White-Slamboree 1997

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You know what, I'm just going to copy-and-paste exactly what I put the last time a non-wrestler was in a match:
"I've said this more than a few times on this blog, but since it has come up again, I'll say it again; NON-WRESTLERS SHOULD NOT WRESTLE. THEY ARE NOT GOOD AT IT."-Me, 2016
But unfortunately, there are countless examples of untrained non-wrestlers coming into wrestling promotions and stepping in the ring with the wrestlers. In this match, we see Pro Football Hall of Famer and at the time defensive end for the Green Bay Packers Reggie White face off against former football player Steve "Mongo" McMichael. This might seem similar to the famous Wrestlemania XII match between Bam Bam Bigelow and Lawerence Taylor. The problem is that Taylor had one of the most agile and underrated big men in wrestling to work with, and White has the guy who rivals Paul Roma as the worst Horseman of all time. Let's get into this.
The two circle each other before locking up and White shoving Mongo back into the corner. The two do the "can't knock each other down" spot twice, with Mongo falling on the third spot. Mongo calls for the two to line up against each other like they're on the line of scrimmage, and it works out in Mongo's favor as he clips White's leg. They do the spot again, with White hopping over Mongo this time and sending him face-first into the second turnbuckle (the most dangerous turnbuckle, of course) before clubbing him out of the ring. Mongo tries to bail on the match, but outcomes Packers nose tackle Gilbert Brown to carry him back to the ring. There are a lot of football players on this show. Mongo, White, Brown, and Kevin Greene shows up later in the main event. This must be super confusing for people who don't watch football.
After White hits a fairly decent dropkick, Mongo locks in an armbar, during which he delivers this incredible line
"JESUS MAY HAVE YOUR SOUL, BUT I'VE GOT YOUR ASS NOW!"-Steve "Mongo" McMichael, 1997
Even funnier, that line is enough to fuel Reggie White into breaking free from the armbar and clobbering Mongo from the ring again. THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS HIM! Mongo gets back and immediately gets caught in a headlock, but Mongo forces a break by getting the ropes. Mongo uses the break to clip White's left leg. Mongo keeps working on the leg before hitting a sidewalk slam. White dodges a leg drop and hits a crossbody for a near fall before locking the dreaded, deadly DOUBLE SHOULDER CLAW! In another funny moment, White forces Mongo onto his knees to pray and say he'll go to church. This match is actually pretty funny.
Mongo forces a break again, allowing him to low blow White and lock in a half crab. White makes it to the ropes and blocks Mongo's attempts to ram him head first into the corner, but Mongo targets the knee again. White boots Mongo from the ring by blocking a figure four leglock attempt and throws Mongo off the top rope soon after. White strikes away at Mongo before hitting an atomic drop and clotheslining him out of the ring. Mongo pulls White out of the ring and the two brawl at ringside before going back in the ring. Mongo takes control at first, but White manages to block a suplex attempt and hit one of his own before hitting a splash. Mongo's wife Debra hops up on the ring apron to distract the referee, making him miss White's visual three count. White tries to get the referee's attention, but Mongo takes a briefcase and prepares to hit White with it, but Gilbert Brown takes it from him. Mongo calls the referee over to deal with the seemingly interfering Brown, which allows Jeff Jarrett to run down and toss Mongo another briefcase. Mongo hits White with the briefcase and gets the three for the win. 

The Verdict

To be honest...this wasn't that bad. In fact, it was fairly decent. White was fairly good in the ring, better than most celebrity guest wrestlers, and a lot of the spots were funny.  It might just be because I've watched so many bad matches in this series, but this is one of the better ones on the list.

Rankings (Best to Worst)

  1. Too Much vs Al Snow & Head-King of the Ring 1998
  2. Vampiro vs Sting-Great American Bash 2000
  3. T&A vs Head Cheese-WrestleMania 2000
  4. Triple H vs Sgt. Slaughter-D-Generation X: In Your House
  5. Konnan vs One Man Gang-SuperBrawl VI
  6. Ultimate Warrior vs Hercules-WrestleMania IV
  7. Rick Rude vs Hawk-Clash of the Champions XXV
  8. Shelton Benjamin vs Viscera-New Year's Revolution 2006
  9. Steve McMichael vs Reggie White-Slamboree 1997
  10. The Chamber of Horrors-Halloween Havoc 1991
  11. The Natural Disasters vs Money Inc.-WrestleMania VIII
  12. ODB, Taylor Wilde, and Roxxi vs The Kongtourage-Genesis 2009
  13. Ivory vs Tori-SummerSlam 1999
  14. Nikita Koloff vs Bobby Eaton-Bunkhouse Stampede
  15. Total Divas vs Other Divas-Survivor Series 2013
  16. The Oddities vs Kaientai-SummerSlam 1998
  17. Hulk Hogan vs Sid Justice-WrestleMania VIII
  18. Paul Ellering vs Teddy Long-Capital Combat
  19. Dusty Rhodes vs Big Boss Man-Saturday Night's Main Event (10/31/1989)
  20. Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Hog Wild
  21. Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Souled Out 1997
  22. Dustin Rhodes & King Kong vs Awesome Kong & The Equalizer-Battlebowl
  23. Finlay & Little Bastard vs The Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman-No Way Out 2007
  24. Jake Roberts vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania V
  25. Yokozuna vs King Mabel-In Your House 4
  26. Sting & Hawk vs Meng & Kurasawa-Clash of the Champions XXXI
  27. Hulk Hogan vs Randy Savage-Uncensored 1998
  28. Al Snow vs Big Boss Man-Unforgiven 1999
  29. Mickie James vs Ashley-Royal Rumble 2006
  30. Christy Hemme vs Big Fat Oily Guy-Against All Odds 2007
  31. Team WCW vs nWo Wolfpac vs nWo Hollywood-Fall Brawl 1998
  32. Vampiro vs Oklahoma-Starrcade 1999
  33. Hulk Hogan vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania III
  34. Van Hammer vs Terrance Taylor-Clash of the Champions XVI
  35. Junkyard Dog vs Moondog Spot-Wrestling Classic
  36. Hiroshi Wajima vs Tom Magee-All Japan Pro Wrestling 1988
  37. Jim Steele vs The Equalizer-SuperBrawl IV
  38. Edge vs Triple H vs Vladimir Kozlov-Survivor Series 2008
  39. Kevin Sullivan vs Dave Sullivan-SuperBrawl V
  40. Steve McMichael vs Brian Adams-Road Wild 1998
  41. Scott Hall vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl IX
  42. PN News & Bobby Eaton vs Steve Austin & Terrance Taylor-Great American Bash 1991
  43. Scott Steiner vs Sid Vicious vs Jeff Jarrett vs Road Warrior Animal-Sin
  44. Hollywood Hogan vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl 1997
  45. Batista vs The Great Khali-SummerSlam 2007
  46.  Sable vs Tori-WrestleMania XV
  47. Super Invader vs Todd Champion-WrestleWar 1992
  48. Sid Vicious vs The Nightstalker-Clash of the Champions XIII
  49. The 8-Divas Tag Match-Survivor Series 1999
  50. The Fabulous Freebirds vs The Renegade Warriors-Halloween Havoc 1990
  51. Rick Rude vs Masahiro Chono-Halloween Havoc 1992
  52. Mike Awesome vs Vampiro-Halloween Havoc 2000
  53. Bray Wyatt vs John Cena-Extreme Rules 2014
  54. Mabel vs The Undertaker-King of the Ring 1995
  55. Wendi Richter vs The Fabulous Moolah-The Brawl to End it All
  56. David Flair vs Kimberly Page-Mayhem 1999
  57. The Truth Commission vs The Disciples of Apocolypse-Survivor Series 1997
  58. The Bushwhacker vs The Fabulous Rougeaus-WrestleMania V
  59. Teddy Long vs Eric Bischoff-Survivor Series 2005
  60. Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling
  61. Abdullah the Butcher vs One Man Gang-Heroes of Wrestling
  62. Hollywood Hogan vs The Warrior-Halloween Havoc 1998
  63. Mr. T vs Roddy Piper-WrestleMania 2
  64. The Royal Family vs Clowns R' Us-Survivor Series 1994
  65. The Blacktop Bully vs Dustin Rhodes-Uncensored 1995
  66. Sting vs Jeff Hardy-Victory Road 2011
  67. Oz vs Tim Parker-SuperBrawl
  68. Ultimate Warrior vs Andre the Giant-Saturday Night's Main Event (11/25/1989)
  69. The Doomsday Cage Match-Uncensored 1996
  70. Kane vs The Undertaker-Judgement Day 1998
  71. Kaitlyn vs Maxine-NXT (10/19/10)
  72. Sabu vs The Sandman-November to Remember 1997
  73. James Storm vs Chris Harris-Lockdown 2007
  74. John Laurinaitis vs John Cena-Over the Limit 2012
  75. Ultimate Warrior vs Goldust-In Your House 7
  76. Los Villanos vs Los Psycho Circus-Triplemania XXIII
  77. Jenna Morasca vs Sharmell-Victory Road 2009
And up next is...
Ugh. I'm back to the ones where I know nothing about either guy in the match. God, I hate these ones.
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