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Worst in the World: Santina Marella vs Vickie Guerrero & Chavo Guerrero-Extreme Rules 2009

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Santino Marella's a wrestler I have mixed feelings about. On one hand, I'd be lying if I said he didn't have some funny moments. His 1.9-second elimination and the follow-up reaction in the 2009 Royal Rumble still makes me laugh, the Honk-a-Meter he had was a very fun gimmick, and I'll stand by it that Tea Time with Santino is genuinely great comedy. On the other hand, when Santino's bad...he's really bad. And arguably the worst, least funny bit Santino had during his seven-year run was Santina. Debuting in the Miss WrestleMania battle royal at WrestleMania 25 (which could probably get an entry by itself), Santina Marella, the fake sister of Santino who was really just Santino in drag, won the whole damn thing. If you want an idea of how WWE saw women's wrestling in 2009, the only women's match on the biggest show of the year was won by a comedy act dressed as a woman. The Santina schtick went on for long enough that not only was Santina able to defend the Miss WrestleMania title on a pay-per-view but lost it to Vickie Guerrero and got a rematch for the title at Extreme Rules. People actually paid money to watch this. Santina & Guerrero would face off for the title in a Hog Pen match because Santina called Guerrero a pig. That's it.

Before the match, Jerry Lawler does some stand-up to describe what the Hog Pen match is, such as saying that you "have to look out for #1 and don't step in #2" and ending with a "without further ado-doo." I hate it here. Unlike the Triple H-Henry Godwinn Hog Pen match, the whole match takes place in the pen instead of having to throw your opponent into the pen to win. Sorry for all you Hog Pen match purists, but those are the rules. Santina comes out followed by Vickie & Chavo Guerrero, where Vickie reveals that this will be a handicap hog pen match, with Chavo joining in on the fun. This is news to Chavo, who looks shocked as Vickie tells him to get in the hog pen. The bell rings before Santina throws mud and/or pig sh*t at Chavo.

Chavo beats down Santina, throwing some more mud on Santina before going for a powerbomb. Santina blocks it and backdrops Chavo into the mud, but Chavo takes control again with more strikes and mud shots before trying to throw Santina into the actual hog pen.

Santina blocks it and tosses Chavo in, terrifying these real pigs and nearly crushing one. Is this really worth scaring those innocent little pigs? Chavo hops back in the mud and almost gets rolled up by Santina, but Chavo kicks out and beats down Santina. Vickie tags in. Nice to see some tag team etiquette that was sorely missing from the Hog Pen match. Santina grabs a bucket of slop and aims at Vickie, but Chavo enters the ring to stop him and grabs a bucket of his own. Chavo tosses the bucket at Santina, but Santina dodges it and Vickie gets slopped. Santina drops some slop on Chavo before throwing Vickie down and pinning her for the win. Vickie & Chavo argue in the mud for way too long before we cut to the outside.

The Verdict

I know this is really short...but my God is this just absolutely miserable. Awful comedy, borderline zero wrestling. This was just complete and utter ass from start to finish. 

Rankings (Best to Worst)

  1. Rick Rude vs Jake Roberts-WrestleMania IV
  2. Too Much vs Al Snow & Head-King of the Ring 1998
  3. Brock Lesnar vs Roman Reigns-Greatest Royal Rumble
  4. Randy Orton vs Bray Wyatt-WrestleMania 33
  5. Vampiro vs Sting-Great American Bash 2000
  6. T&A vs Head Cheese-WrestleMania 2000
  7. Triple H vs Sgt. Slaughter-D-Generation X: In Your House
  8. Konnan vs One Man Gang-SuperBrawl VI
  9. Ultimate Warrior vs Hercules-WrestleMania IV
  10. Rick Rude vs Hawk-Clash of the Champions XXV
  11. Shelton Benjamin vs Viscera-New Year's Revolution 2006
  12. Steve McMichael vs Reggie White-Slamboree 1997
  13. The Tag Team Fatal 4-Way Match-WrestleMania 13
  14. Tag Team Battle Royal-WrestleMania XIV
  15. The Chamber of Horrors-Halloween Havoc 1991
  16. The Natural Disasters vs Money Inc.-WrestleMania VIII
  17. Ivan Koloff vs Paul Jones-Clash of the Champions IV
  18. ODB, Taylor Wilde, and Roxxi vs The Kongtourage-Genesis 2009
  19. Ivory vs Tori-SummerSlam 1999
  20. Giant Baba vs Bulldog Bob Brown-WrestleRock
  21. The Reverse Battle Royal-Impact! (10/26/2006)
  22. Jerry Blackwell vs Boris Zhukov-SuperClash II
  23. Nikita Koloff vs Bobby Eaton-Bunkhouse Stampede
  24. Alex Wright vs Steve McMichael-Halloween Havoc 1997
  25. The Great Khali vs Kane-WrestleMania 23
  26. Savio Vega vs Crush vs Faarooq-Ground Zero: In Your House
  27. The Shockmaster vs Awesome/King Kong-Starrcade 1993
  28. Total Divas vs Other Divas-Survivor Series 2013
  29. The Oddities vs Kaientai-SummerSlam 1998
  30. Hulk Hogan vs Sid Justice-WrestleMania VIII
  31. Paul Ellering vs Teddy Long-Capital Combat
  32. Dusty Rhodes vs Big Boss Man-Saturday Night's Main Event (10/31/1989)
  33. Tyson Tomko vs Stevie Richards-Unforgiven 2004
  34. Kane vs The Great Khali-SummerSlam 2009
  35. Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Hog Wild
  36. Hollywood Hogan vs The Giant-Souled Out 1997
  37. Dustin Rhodes & King Kong vs Awesome Kong & The Equalizer-Battlebowl
  38. Finlay & Little Bastard vs The Boogeyman & Little Boogeyman-No Way Out 2007
  39. Jake Roberts vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania V
  40. Yokozuna vs King Mabel-In Your House 4
  41. Dusty Rhodes vs The Honky Tonk Man-SummerSlam 1989
  42. Sting & Hawk vs Meng & Kurasawa-Clash of the Champions XXXI
  43. Hulk Hogan vs Randy Savage-Uncensored 1998
  44. Al Snow vs Big Boss Man-Unforgiven 1999
  45. Mickie James vs Ashley-Royal Rumble 2006
  46. Christy Hemme vs Big Fat Oily Guy-Against All Odds 2007
  47. Stevie Ray vs Konnan-World War 3 1998
  48. Vampiro vs The KISS Demon-Bash at the Beach 2000
  49. Team WCW vs nWo Wolfpac vs nWo Hollywood-Fall Brawl 1998
  50. Vampiro vs Oklahoma-Starrcade 1999
  51. Hulk Hogan vs Andre the Giant-WrestleMania III
  52. Van Hammer vs Terrance Taylor-Clash of the Champions XVI
  53. Junkyard Dog vs Moondog Spot-Wrestling Classic
  54. The Undertaker vs Goldberg-Super ShowDown 2019
  55. Hiroshi Wajima vs Tom Magee-All Japan Pro Wrestling 1988
  56. Jim Duggan vs Big Boss Man-Royal Rumble 1990
  57. Meng vs Jim Duggan-Uncensored 1995
  58. Jim Steele vs The Equalizer-SuperBrawl IV
  59. The Undertaker vs Giant González-WrestleMania IX
  60. Sting vs Tony Palmore-Battle 7
  61. D-Generation X vs Brothers of Destruction-Crown Jewel
  62. Wendi Richter vs Leilani Kai-WrestleMania
  63. Goldberg vs Brock Lesnar-WrestleMania XX
  64. Edge vs Triple H vs Vladimir Kozlov-Survivor Series 2008
  65. Kevin Sullivan vs Dave Sullivan-SuperBrawl V
  66. Steve McMichael vs Brian Adams-Road Wild 1998
  67. Scott Hall vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl IX
  68. Boris Zhukov vs Paul Samson-Beach Brawl
  69. Kane vs The Great Khali-Breaking Point
  70. PN News & Bobby Eaton vs Steve Austin & Terrance Taylor-Great American Bash 1991
  71. Scott Steiner vs Sid Vicious vs Jeff Jarrett vs Road Warrior Animal-Sin
  72. Hollywood Hogan vs Roddy Piper-SuperBrawl 1997
  73. Batista vs The Great Khali-SummerSlam 2007
  74.  Sable vs Tori-WrestleMania XV
  75. Super Invader vs Todd Champion-WrestleWar 1992
  76. Brock Lesnar vs Cain Velasquez-Crown Jewel 2019
  77. King Kong Bundy & Jim Neidhart vs Yokozuna & Jake Roberts-Heroes of Wrestling
  78. Sid Vicious vs The Nightstalker-Clash of the Champions XIII
  79. The 8-Divas Tag Match-Survivor Series 1999
  80. The Fabulous Freebirds vs The Renegade Warriors-Halloween Havoc 1990
  81. The Knockouts Gauntlet-One Night Only: Live! 2016
  82. AJ Styles vs Frank Trigg-No Surrender 2008
  83. Rick Rude vs Masahiro Chono-Halloween Havoc 1992
  84. Mike Awesome vs Vampiro-Halloween Havoc 2000
  85. Bray Wyatt vs John Cena-Extreme Rules 2014
  86. Brothers of Destruction vs KroniK-Unforgiven 2001
  87. Mabel vs The Undertaker-King of the Ring 1995
  88. Wendi Richter vs The Fabulous Moolah-The Brawl to End it All
  89. David Flair vs Kimberly Page-Mayhem 1999
  90. The Truth Commission vs The Disciples of Apocolypse-Survivor Series 1997
  91. Daffney vs Miss Hancock-Bash at the Beach 2000
  92. The Bushwhacker vs The Fabulous Rougeaus-WrestleMania V
  93. The Beverly Brothers vs The Bushwhackers-Royal Rumble 1992
  94. Teddy Long vs Eric Bischoff-Survivor Series 2005
  95. Greg Valentine vs George Steele-Heroes of Wrestling
  96. Abdullah the Butcher vs One Man Gang-Heroes of Wrestling
  97. Major Gunns vs Miss Hancock-New Blood Rising
  98. Bradshaw & Trish Stratus vs Christopher Nowinski & Jackie Gayda-RAW (7/8/2002)
  99. Triple H vs Scott Steiner-Royal Rumble 2003
  100. Santina Marella vs Vickie & Chavo Guerrero-Extreme Rules 2009
  101. Kevin Nash vs Scott Steiner vs Goldberg-New Blood Rising
  102. Hollywood Hogan vs The Warrior-Halloween Havoc 1998
  103. Mr. T vs Roddy Piper-WrestleMania 2
  104. The Royal Family vs Clowns R' Us-Survivor Series 1994
  105. The Blacktop Bully vs Dustin Rhodes-Uncensored 1995
  106. Team Dos Caras vs Team El Canek-Leyendas Mexicanas 2017
  107. Pat Patterson vs Gerald Brisco-King of the Ring 2000
  108. The Four Doinks vs Team Bigelow-Survivor Series 1993
  109. Sting vs Jeff Hardy-Victory Road 2011
  110. Oz vs Tim Parker-SuperBrawl
  111. Brock Lesnar vs Braun Strowman-Crown Jewel 2018
  112. Brock Lesnar vs Ricochet-Super ShowDown 2020
  113. The Mighty Maccabee vs The Iron Sheik-Maccabiah Mania II: Shekel Slam
  114. Van Hammer vs Doug Somers-Halloween Havoc 1991
  115. Ultimate Warrior vs Andre the Giant-Saturday Night's Main Event (11/25/1989)
  116. Jeff Jarrett vs Sting-Halloween Havoc 2000
  117. The Doomsday Cage Match-Uncensored 1996
  118. Kane vs The Undertaker-Judgement Day 1998
  119. Rebel vs Shelly Martinez-One Night Only: Knockouts Knockdown
  120. Kaitlyn vs Maxine-NXT (10/19/2010)
  121. Sabu vs The Sandman-November to Remember 1997
  122. Seth Rollins vs "The Fiend" Bray Wyatt-Hell in a Cell 2019
  123. Michael Cole vs Jerry Lawler-WrestleMania XXVII
  124. The Bushwhackers vs Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff-Heroes of Wrestling
  125. James Storm vs Chris Harris-Lockdown 2007
  126. John Laurinaitis vs John Cena-Over the Limit 2012
  127. Ultimate Warrior vs Goldust-In Your House 7
  128. Los Villanos vs Los Psycho Circus-Triplemania XXIII
  129. Jenna Morasca vs Sharmell-Victory Road 2009

Thanks for reading! Be sure to share if you enjoy and leave any suggestions for matches you'd like to see covered on the Worst in the World. Until next time.

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