Welcome back to another edition of RAW vs Nitro. Click here to read the last one if you missed it. So now, let's get into it, this is RAW vs Nitro #54!
RAW
RAW kicks off with a recap package, showing the famous birth of the term "pillmanize" when Stone Cold Steve Austin crushed Brian Pillman's ankle with a chair on Superstars.
The opening also hypes up interviews with Stone Cold and Bret Hart via satellite and the main event between Shawn Michaels and the British Bulldog.
"Double J" Jesse James vs Salvatore Sincere
The first match pits "The Real Double J" Jesse James against Salvatore Sincere, a man who main evented RAW once and then disappeared for almost two months. Before the match, they show pictures of the future Road Dogg from Desert Storm, which just reminds me that they completely skipped the interview he was supposed to do last week about being in Desert Storm. Anyway, this match immediately starts with Vince McMahon forgetting the storyline and calling Jesse James Jeff Jarrett on commentary before a messy hip toss to the outside by James. At one point, Sincere gets tied up in the ropes and, after James punches him, Sincere rebounds back into another punch. The ref admonishes Double J, so James humps the air in front of him.
He's about two years too soon with that. Pretty much the whole match is Double J on offense, ending with a pumphandle slam (no bumming just yet) for the three and the win. Aside from the opening botch, their's nothing really wrong with this match, but it has absolutely nothing worth watching.
Dok Hendrix hypes up the Survivor Series weekend and the Hall of Fame ceremony, only to be interrupted by Stone Cold Steve Austin. Austin says no one cares about (in his own words) "eight old farts getting a trophy handed to them." He demands Hendrix "get him on camera on do his damn job" before leaving. Hendrix returns to his hype job, including announcing a Survivor Series match pitting the team of Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, and Crush against the team of Marc Mero, Mark Henry, the Stalker Barry Windham, and a debuting Rocky Maivia! Hendrix also hypes up the Undertaker vs Mankind and Bret Hart vs Stone Cold Steve Austin. Austin shows up again to question why Hart isn't here tonight and says things like that will get people's asses kicked. He ends by saying he'll whoop Hart's ass before leaving again. Cut to a shot of Bret Hart at his home, playing with his cat.
I guess that just runs in the family. We also see Austin getting make-up put on him before sending the assistant off.
Crush with Clarence Mason vs Aldo Montoya...sort of
Cockface is back!
It's been too long. Before the match, we get a phone call with Marc Mero. He says he's "perfectly pissed off" and that he wants Gorilla Monsoon to reinstate Mr. Perfect. He then says that no matter where he runs into him, the next time he sees him he's going to pull his "scrawny blonde hair out of his fat head" and make him pay for costing him the Intercontinental Championship. He then turns his attention to Hunter Hearst Helmsley, saying that he's now the hunted and says that at Survivor Series, people will feel sorry for him. Jerry Lawler chimes in, so Mero says that at Survivor Series we'll see how many whoppers will fit in his fat head. That's his go-to insult, I guess. Lawler makes a comment about Perfect getting close to Sable, causing Mero to explode and say she had nothing to do with this. He blames himself for letting Perfect into his inner circle and says Perfect's days are numbered. He has no idea how right he is. I really enjoyed this, I thought Mero came across as legitimately pissed at everything that happened and (aside from calling everyone's heads fat) I thought he had a great intense promo. It's certainly more interesting than this match, which is so unimportant that we get ANOTHER interruption courtesy of Jim Ross, who shows up on commentary. He says that, at his recommendation, Farooq has acquired the services of Clarence Mason as his new manager. He throws a shot at the NFL's Michael Irvin, saying that he's like Crush, a great player when he can stay out of jail. Crush ends up winning the match after connecting with the heart punch, which JR says wouldn't affect Vince McMahon. I know JR's heel turn isn't looked on too fondly nowadays, but man if he isn't hilarious as a heel. As for the match...it's nothing. The only thing of note are some fans taunting Crush with a crudely made "JAILBIRD!" sign.
They are definitely plants because no one cares enough about Crush to make a sign making fun of him. Because of these fans, Crush is provoked to attack a security guard.
Before the commercial, Stone Cold is pissed at being jerked around by Vince McMahon and not getting any airtime, only to turn his attention to someone behind the camera trying to cut him off. Stone Cold approaches him before we got to the Karate Fighters tournament, where Mr. Perfect distracts Phineas Godwinn almost immediately by saying Dolly Parton was behind him and wins. Mr. Perfect calls him a dumb hillbilly after winning. Also for some reason, these Karate Fighters segments appear to filmed in the Shrine of the Silver Monkey from Legends of the Hidden Temple.
Next week, Sycho Sid faces Marlea. Also, they spelled Sable's name wrong on the bracket.
Before we get back to the show, we get an advertisement hyping up an interview with Brian Pillman live from his home. That brings another objection from Stone Cold, who's pissed that he had to show up to the WWF studio when Bret Hart & Pillman both got to stay home and get interviewed. He then says that if Pillman's getting interviewed, then he'll be there too.
Vince McMahon asks Stone Cold if he thinks he's done enough to Pillman, but Austin just blasts Pillman for using his interview time to talk about Bret Hart and that's why he attacked him. He then says that if Pillman comes back, he'll send him to the cemetery. He says Pillman was just his puppet, just like Gorilla Monsoon is just McMahon's puppet. He says McMahon won't do anything to stop him because he & Hart will make a lot of money for him off this match, even though he'd kick Hart's ass for free. After another commercial break, Bret Hart gets brought in via satellite, sitting with two of his children. The audio is f*cked, which is probably for the best as Sunny is making her way down to the ring. She sits down on Lawler's lap and kisses him on the head and on the cheek before we get our next match.
Billy Gunn vs Freddie Joe Floyd
THE SMOKING GUNNS EXPLODE! The Gunns are no more after having a shoving match on Superstars, which led to Billy abandoning Bart during their match against the New Rockers. Now Billy's out on his own, wrestling Freddie Joe Floyd, who is fresh off his win over Hunter Hearst Helmsley via shenanigans. During the match, Bart makes his way down to ringside to confront his brother. The two go face-to-face, with Bart challenging Billy to get in the ring as referees escort him to the back. Floyd is able to mount some offense off the distractions, but Billy Gunn gets the win off a hideous guillotine leg drop. The whole match is pretty much nothing, just like...every match tonight so far.
Back to some good sh*t for a change. Now that Hart's audio works, he says that after 12 years, he needed a break from wrestling and calls Stone Cold a great wrestler, but says that didn't factor into his decision to return. Austin responds by saying that that's Hart's way of saying he's afraid that he's going to get his ass kicked. Hart says Austin doesn't have what it takes to kick his ass before McMahon asks him about potential ring rust. Hart hesitates, so Austin yells "ANSWER!" There's a reason he's one of the guys who pretty much saved the WWF. Hart says Austin is the best the WWF has right now, and he couldn't think of anyone better to come back against. Hart says he can accept a loss to Austin and that he'll get back up after a loss, but Austin says that even they won't be done with eachother after Survivor Series, and that win, lose, or draw, Hart will have to kill him to get him off his ass. Hart laughs off that comment, so Austin yells at him again. Hart starts a response, but McMahon cuts him off. Austin gets angry again and threatens the man behind the camera again. This time, Austin tosses the man into some lighting equipment before spiking a monitor. Everything about this is FANTASTIC. Austin's insanity and Hart's calm demeanor bounce off eachother so well it makes for the best thing the WWF has done in a long time by far. Before we get to the next match, we get a shot Austin getting confronted by a security guard trying to get him to leave. Austin shoves him in response before a commercial break.
The British Bulldog with Clarence Mason vs Shawn Michaels with Jose Lothario
Owen Hart takes a seat at commentary for this match, which is great because he's just great in general. Speaking of great...this match. Michaels is obviously one of the best of all time and Bulldog is pretty great in his own right, so putting them together gives us one of the best matches RAW has had in a long time. Unfortunately, we get just get a great main event, as the match ends in some familiar schmoz. Following a diving elbow drop from HBK, Michaels tunes up and band and calls for Sweet Chin Music. This prompts Hart to leave the commentary table and grabs Michaels' legs. Bulldog attacks Michaels as Hart holds him in place for a beatdown, causing a DQ. Sycho Sid quickly runs down to even the odds, during which Sid "inadvertently" elbows Michaels in the back hard.
Michaels & Sid dump Hart & Bulldog out of the ring before the two have an argument for the third straight week. The two have a shoving match before Hart gets on the mic. He challenges the two of them to a match with their Tag Team Championships on the line, which appears to calm the two down and they accept.
RAW closes with something that will become a familiar sight, with Stone Cold being confronted by police outside of the WWF studio.
And that's it for RAW. Onto Nitro.
But first! A quick recap of Halloween Havoc 1996 (sorry, Slim Jim's Halloween Havoc), which happened the day before this episode of Nitro.
- In a pair of dark matches, Jim Powers defeated Pat Tanaka while Psychosis & Juventud Guerrera defeated Damian
666& Halloween (the future Ciclope) - Dean Malenko defeated Rey Mysterio Jr to win the WCW Cruiserweight Championship. Malenko countered a top rope Frankensteiner and pinned Mysterio with a super gutwrench powerbomb.
- Diamond Dallas Page defeated Eddie Guerrero, pinning him off a Diamond Cutter for the three
- In a match-up between the Giant and Jeff Jarrett with Ric Flair in his corner, the Giant was floored after running into the ring post, allowing Jarrett to lock in the figure four leglock. The Giant fought out by grabbing Jarrett for a chokeslam, but Flair caused a DQ by giving the Giant a low blow. The rest of the Four Horsemen run down to the ring, preventing any retaliation by the Giant.
- Syxx defeated Chris Jericho, pinning him after a spinning heel kick in a match full of Nick Patrick shenanigans. Jericho got two visual three counts on Syxx during the match, but Patrick was "too injured" to make the count, only for no issues whatsoever when Syxx makes the winning fall.
- Lex Luger defeated Arn Anderson via submission with the Torture Rack, which he keeps locked in for a long time after the bell. During the match, Luger beat Anderson down with a chair while the referee is down. Also, the Dungeon of Doom was in the crowd...for some reason.
- Chris Benoit & Steve McMichael defeated The Faces of Fear. McMichael smashed Meng in the head with his briefcase before Benoit hit the diving headbutt for the three and the win. After the match, the Barbarian smashed the briefcase across Mongo's back. The rest of the Dungeon of Doom hops the barricade and joins in on a beatdown of Benoit & Mongo, during which Kevin Sullivan gets in the face of Woman.
- The Outsiders defeated Harlem Heat to win the WCW World Tag Team Championships. Harlem Heat got the visual three after Booker T hit the Harlem Hangover on Scott Hall, but the referee was distracted trying to get Stevie Ray out of the ring. Kevin Nash tried to break up the fall but was stopped by Col. Rob Parker. Nash prevented Parker's interference and intimidated him into giving him his cane. Parker obliged, allowing Nash to hit Booker with the cane. Hall rolled over to get the three, the win, and the Tag Team Championships as Parker ran to the back.
- In the main event, Hollywood Hulk Hogan retained the WCW World Heavyweight Championship against the Macho Man Randy Savage. During the match, Miss Elizabeth (who was in a "neutral corner") got in the ring to prevent a leg drop from Hogan. Hogan took her to the corner and scolded her, giving Savage enough time to recover and dodge the leg drop. Hogan tries to use a foreign object, but Elizabeth takes it from him. Hogan then accidentally clotheslines the referee as Ted DiBiase wrestles the object away from Elizabeth. Savage manages to bodyslam Hogan, hits the top rope elbow drop, and makes the cover as Nick Patrick runs in to make the count. Patrick gets to two...but his neck hurts too much to count three. Savage shoves Patrick to the ground and attacks him as Hogan gets the object from DiBiase. Savage blocks the cheap shot, gets the object and hits Hogan. Savage goes for another elbow drop, but DiBiase stops him and gets him to the outside. Savage tries to attack DiBiase, but the Giant runs down and chokeslams him at ringside. Giant rolls Savage back into the ring, allowing Hogan to get the three and the win. After the match, the Giant runs back up the ramp and comes back with a punch bowl full of ice water, which he immediately spills when he gets to ringside.Giant used the ice water to wake up Hogan, which is oddly comically for the biggest group in wrestling to be doing in the main event of a pay-per-view. Hogan gets on the mic and says he's the king of Hollywood before Scottish bagpipes start playing. Outcomes Rowdy Roddy Piper!
...and some guy behind him. He doesn't do anything or show up on camera...I don't know why he's there. Piper gets on the mic and says he's in WCW to end Hogan's boredom. He says he's not there to represent anyone and says he's just as big an icon in wrestling and a movie-star in Hollywood as Hogan is. He's underselling it, honestly. Roddy Piper's been in They Live...Hogan's been in Mr. Nanny. Hogan tries to chime in, but Piper is having none of it, running down Hogan for only being loved in wrestling because people hated him so much. He says he's the only man Hogan has never been able to beat. He says the fans made Hogan, but Hogan says Piper's in his world now and that Piper's day is coming. Piper grabs the championship belt as the show finally closes mid-promo. Holy sh*t, how much longer did Piper ramble for? That was insane.
Nitro
Nitro kicks off with a recap of Halloween Havoc from Tony Schiavone and Larry Zbyszko, who is wearing a Superman t-shirt under his suit jacket...
...for some reason. They say they'll replay the closing of Halloween Havoc during tonight's second hour. Please don't. Zbyszko also says Piper's movies are better than Hogan's. Where's the lie?
Lord Steven Regal (c) vs Juventud Guerrera-WCW Television Championship
Oh thank God, he's back! If you don't remember, Lord Steven Regal won the Television Championship from Lex Luger on a WCW Saturday Night episode and then disappeared for two months. This is his first time on Nitro since August, and apparently, this is his first match on TV since winning the belt. Schiavone & Zbyszko cover for Regal's absence by saying he's been defending the title "around the world." Before the match actually starts, we get a shot of Sting, sitting above the rest of the fans.
He's not really in the rafters, but he's in the nosebleed seats, so I guess that's close enough(?) As soon as the match starts, Syxx pops up in the crowd and welcomes the world to nWo Nitro. He says he'll win the Cruiserweight Championship and tells Sting to "make the right choice." This promo also gives us a cameo by a young future WWE & AEW ring announcer Justin Roberts.
Juvi and Regal end up having a good, back and forth match, which is unfortunately overshadowed by all the commotion. The match ends with Regal locking in the Regal Stretch after Guerrera whiffs off a 450 splash. Regal gets the submission win and retains the title. Following the win, Regal is supposed to be interviewed by Schiavone as Sting leaves his seat, but that never happens for some reason.
Diamond Dallas Page vs Mike Enos
Mike Enos had a really good match with Chris Jericho on Nitro once. It looks like he's trying to replicate the quality of that match early on, even going so hard on a Cactus Clothesline that he nearly necks himself on the bottom rope.
DDP and Enos end up putting on a pretty good match together, but it's not without some nWo thrown in there for good measure. During the match, the Outsiders show up with their newly won WCW World Tag Team Championships. The match ends with Enos going for a powerslam, but DDP is able to block it by hooking his feet on the top rope before knocking Enos off balance and hitting the Diamond Cutter. This gets applause from the Outsiders as Page gets the three and the win.
Jim Powers with Teddy Long vs Dean Malenko
As with every match involving a Teddy Long client, Nick Patrick is the referee for this match. Nick Patrick has two jobs in WCW right now.
- Secretly working for the nWo.
- F*ck with Teddy Long.
The match is pretty solid, mainly because I don't think Dean Malenko can put on a match that isn't at least decent. During the match, Psychosis pops up on the ramp, making a throat slit gesture towards the camera as he watches the match. The match ends with Patrick doing his job and screwing Teddy Long's guy out of a win. After Powers hits a powerslam and makes the cover, Patrick instead opts to tell Long to get back in his corner, despite the fact that Long hasn't moved from his corner at all. This causes him to miss the visual three by Powers and allowing Malenko to roll up Powers for the three and the win. After the match, Patrick & Teddy Long argue...as is tradition.
Ricky Morton vs Jeff Jarrett
This is a match where if Ricky Morton was in his prime and it wasn't just a throwaway TV match, it would probably be really good. But he's not, and it is, so it's just decent. That's all I've really got. Jarrett wins with the figure four. After the match, the Giant pops up in the crowd with a mic and the United States Championship. Did he win it? No...it's Ric Flair's still. He doesn't seem to care about it that much, though, and neither does WCW. The title ends up being vacated because of Flair's legitimate shoulder injury...a month later. We'd have to wait another month for another champion to finally be crowned at Starrcade. The Giant quotes the Three Little Pigs(?) and says Jarrett wasn't passed a torch by Flair, he was passed a wet match. He calls the Four Horsemen pathetic and calls them afraid. He says Jarrett avoided the chokeslam at Halloween Havoc, but his day will come and if the Horsemen try to stop him, then he'll take them out too. Back at ringside, Tony Schiavone interviews Jarrett. Jarrett challenges the Giant to come down to ringside, but he's left already. Jarrett says he's done everything he's said he do since coming to WCW before saying WCW needs to unite against the nWo. He says if Sting won't be the leader of WCW, then he and Flair will do it. He says Hulk Hogan will go down and WCW will outlast him. How wrong he was.
High Voltage vs The Amazing French Canadians
High Voltage ambushes the French Canadians as they try to sing the Canadian National Anthem. That was rude. Also, while I'm on the topic, I'm I the only one who finds the Amazing French Canadians gimmick to be weird. I know "obnoxious foreigner" isn't by no means an uncommon gimmick in wrestling, but like...they only like one specific part of the country. Before they sing they tell everyone to show respect to Quebec. So...only Quebec? Like, if Nitro was in Toronto would they still do this gimmick? This is like the equivalent of someone being like "You all wish you were from a great state like OHIO!" Midway through the match, we enter the second hour. And yes, even if it's mid-match, there's still highly unnecessary pyro.
Eventually, the Nasty Boys run in to beat up High Voltage to cause a DQ, disappointing no one. The Nastys get on the mic and say they don't need to belong anywhere. They say that even if they aren't liked or wanted, they're still nasty and have been before the nWo or even WCW were a thing. The tell the nWo that they're ready to rumble before leaving. Yeah...this was not good.
Rey Mysterio Jr vs Jimmy Graffiti
How the f*ck does this goob get two straight TV appearances. Like, I know Jimmy Del Ray isn't bad, but take a look at Jimmy Graffiti. The fact that this dude is even on TV is gross. Again, he's not a bad wrestler, hence why this match is pretty good. Of course, the fact that he's wrestling Rey Mysterio doesn't hurt at all. As someone who was first introduced to Mysterio as the guy who would have boring matches with Alberto Del Rio every few weeks before going on the disabled list for 10 months, I can't tell you how refreshing it is to see Rey Mysterio Jr killing it on Nitro. He has his moments nowadays (see his matches with Andrade on SmackDown) but on Nitro, he's doing that pretty much every time he's on TV. It's great. Mysterio wins after hitting the West Coast Pop and rolling through for the three and the win. He looks into the camera to tell Dean Malenko he's coming to get the Cruiserweight Championship back.
Eddie Guerrero vs Chris Benoit with Woman
The story going into this match is that both are working hurt following Halloween Havoc. Guerrero's got his ribs taped up while Benoit's got his shoulder wrapped up. That being said, even though they have to sell injuries, the match is still absolutely great. Benoit is easily one of the best in-ring performers I've ever seen, and Guerrero isn't too far behind. Every time you put them together its magic. During the match, we get a picture in picture promo from Jimmy Hart & Kevin Sullivan. Sullivan makes biblical references to woman being the destruction of us all before saying something the Network captions can't pick up. But you don't need to know what he said because, as you probably know, this angle is a lot deeper. If you don't know, Woman is Kevin Sullivan's real-life wife Nancy. Kevin Sullivan is also the booker for WCW. He booked this angle where it gets revealed that Woman is actually his wife and that she had left him for Benoit. That angle became real life, and Nancy and Benoit's on-screen affair became a reality, with Sullivan essentially booking the real-life end of his own marriage. It's not a fun thing to talk about, but it's hard to ignore when this feud starts up. Also during the match, Steve McMichael and Debra come down to ringside and argues with Phoenix Suns' forward and legit wrestling superfan (as evident by his appearances in the crowd in Lucha Underground) AC Green.
They actually used footage taken at this Nitro for "Suns Stuff" which I guess was to show what the Suns do when they don't play basketball(?) But I digress, you don't want to read what I have to say about basketball...unless you do, then here you go. This match ends just as you'd expect it, with Horsemen shenanigans. Woman hops up on the ring apron, causing Nick Patrick to get distracted. This allows Mongo to hit Guerrero in the ribs with his briefcase, allowing Benoit to make the cover, get the three, and the win. Even with the screwy finish, this is still a great match with great selling by both men. After the match, Nick Patrick goes up to the entrance ramp to get interviewed by Tony Schiavone. Along with him, however, is his lawyer. Patrick and his lawyer blame Patrick's actions in last night's main event on Chris Jericho. This brings out Jericho, who says Patrick is faking his injury and that he's in the nWo. The lawyer steps in, but Jericho is not having any of it. Teddy Long makes his way down to get into the interview. He calls the lawyer a scam artist and says if he didn't have a degree, he'd be on street corners, washing windows for change. He says Patrick is holding Jericho back, so the lawyer threatens a slander lawsuit as they cut off by a commercial break.
Booker T with Sister Sherri vs Lex Luger
Unsurprisingly, Col. Rob Parker is nowhere to be seen for this match. Stevie Ray isn't here either, but that's probably for the best. Anyway, Parker is backstage cutting a picture-in-picture promo, who deflects blame for Harlem Heat's loss at Halloween Havoc. This match is pretty solid, albeit filled with a bit too much stalling on Booker's part. The finish sees Luger all set to put Booker in the Torture Rack, only for Sting to appear in the crowd.
Luger can sense this apparently because he wasn't facing that direction. Luger hops the barricade and makes his way towards Sting, who walks back out of the stands, giving Booker the count out win. Fine enough match, but the finish was pretty wonky.
The show closes with a (mostly) unedited re-airing Roddy Piper's rambling WCW debut at Halloween Havoc. This is immediately followed by Hollywood Hulk Hogan, Ted DiBiase, the Giant, and Vincent make their way down to the ring. Hogan demands a spotlight before calling himself the John Wayne of the 90s and that the nWo has conquered WCW. Turning his attention to the Macho Man Randy Savage, saying he has respect for Savage but says that he couldn't get the job done. He says he'll take care of Miss Elizabeth for Savage before saying that he saw fear in Piper's eyes. DiBiase gets on the mic and says the nWo's foundation has been built and leaves it to Hogan to "entertain the crowd." Hogan hotdogs and grandstands to end the show.
And that's about it. Overall, I'd give it RAW this week. Nitro didn't really have too much bad about it outside of one match and promo, but nothing really good enough that I'd go back and rewatch outside of Benoit vs Guerrero. RAW, on the other hand, had Stone Cold throughout the night and it was fantastic every single time he showed up. On top of that, Michaels vs Bulldog was great while it lasted, and Marc Mero had a gem of a promo I wasn't expecting. It's finally starting to feel like RAW is trying harder to match WCW's quality, and this week I think it worked. Point to RAW.
RAW: 21
Nitro: 33
Comments
Post a Comment