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My Thoughts on RAW (5/8/17): Inmates Running the Asylum

  • Before the show, Dean Ambrose gets a phone call from Kurt Angle. Whatever Angle tells, he likes and tells the sound guy to hit his music. He comes out and says Angle can't be here tonight and Angle has named him acting general manager for the night. That seems irresponsible. The last time Ambrose had any kind of control he hung a plant above a steel cage. Miz interrupts him and says RAW will be chaos with Ambrose in charge and choosing the general manager would have been better. Ambrose tries to put Miz in tonight's opening match, but Miz says he got called by Stephanie McMahon, who has assigned him to be the Co-General Manager. Ambrose says he'll beat him at Extreme Rules, but offers him a handshake for beating Rollins & Balor in the same match. Before Miz can shake Ambrose's hand, Braun Strowman comes out with his arm in a sling. Strowman says he's going to get what he wants regardless of who's in charge and says he's not finished with Roman Reigns as long as Reigns can walk. He tells them that when his arm heals, he's going to end Reigns. And after that, he wants Brock Lesnar. Strowman gets interrupted by Kalisto, who says he's not done with Strowman and that no one treats him like garbage. Kalisto reminds Strowman that he beat him in their dumpster match a few weeks ago and demands a match with Strowman tonight. Strowman says he can beat Kalisto with one arm, which prompts Ambrose to book the match. Strowman leaves, angry that he has to wrestle injured before Miz mocks him for ending Kalisto's career. Ambrose then tells Miz he is in the first match of the night...against Finn Balor.
  • Finn Balor vs The Miz with Maryse-Balor starts off with a waist lock takedown and controls the match, rolling through on a sunset flip and hitting a basement dropkick. Balor strikes away at Miz before hitting a dropkick for a near fall and clotheslining Miz out of the ring, where Balor dropkicks Miz into the barricade. Back in the ring, Balor sets up for the Coup de Grace, but Maryse pulls Miz out of the ring before the commercial break. We come back to Miz kicking Balor for a near fall. Miz slaps on a chinlock, but Balor fights out, only for Miz to hit a backbreaker/neckbreaker combo for a near fall. Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale, but Balor drops down and rolls up Miz for a near fall. Miz comes back with a DDT for a near fall. Miz follows up with a knee lift before going back to the chinlock. Balor fights out eats a big boot, only to catch Miz with a Pele Kick. Balor runs wild with forearms and a basement dropkick before kicking Miz off the top rope and hitting a baseball slide. Balor hits a running soccer kick from the apron before bringing Miz back in the ring. Miz pleads with Balor as Maryse distracts the referee before throwing Balor into the referee. Miz leaves the ring and grabs the mic, ordering the referee to disqualify Balor for hitting him. Miz announces his victory, but Ambrose comes out, restarts the match, and bans Maryse from ringside. Balor quickly brings Miz back to the ring, hits a Sling Blade, a corner dropkick, and the Coup de Grace for the win. Solid match, nothing special.
  • Backstage, Alexa Bliss is confronted by Nia Jax. She asks Bliss why she was the only person she didn't insult and asks if she meant what she said last week about her. Bliss says she thinks Nia is great before Nia tells her that she deserves a title shot after Bayley. Bliss says she doesn't make the matches, but she'll talk to Angle about it. Nia says Bliss just got a new best friend. Bliss looked happy about that.
  • Alexa Bliss with Nia Jax vs Mickie James with Bayley-Mickie's got backup in the form of Bayley. The two lock and go back and forth before Mickie kicks Alexa for a near fall. Mickie hits a neckbreaker for a near fall before Bliss rolls out of the ring, leaving her open for a baseball slide before the commercial break. We come back to Bliss getting a near fall before beating down Mickie in the corner. Bliss controls the match until Mickie dodges a knee drop, hits a clothesline, a spin kick, and a forearm for a near fall. Mickie goes for the Mickie-DT, but Bliss blocks it, only to take a flapjack. Mickie goes to the top rope, but Jax grabs her foot to stop her from diving. Bayley takes out Jax with a crossbody, but the distraction was enough for Bliss to yank James down and cover her for the win. Bayley chases Bliss to the back, leaving Mickie prone for a beatdown from Jax. 
  • Backstage, Miz & Ambrose argue before Ambrose shows Miz what he has planned for tonight. Miz says he wants MizTV tonight, but Ambrose cancels it. Miz then books Ambrose against Bray Wyatt tonight.
  • Charly Caruso interviews Samoa Joe. He says Rollins didn't achieve anything by beating him the way he did at Payback and says it's not over with Rollins until he says it's over. He says he's going to break Rollins before Rollins attacks him from behind. The two brawl before being broken up by referees and officials.
  • Braun Strowman vs Kalisto-Before the match, Strowman takes the mic and tells Ambrose to shove it and refuses to wrestle Kalisto. Strowman prepares to leave, but the match starts so he kicks Kalisto in the face. Strowman kicks the sh*t out of Kalisto before Roman Reigns' music hits. Outcomes Roman Reigns. He gets in the ring, kicks Strowman's bad arm and hits three Superman Punches. Strowman rolls out of the ring and leans against the barricade, where Reigns charges at him, only to eat a boot. Strowman charges at Reigns, but Reigns dodges, sending Strowman into the ring post. Reigns beats on Strowman's arm before ramming it into the post & apron before smashing it with a chair. Strowman retreats through the crowd as Reigns' stands tall.
  • Backstage, The Golden Truth prepare for the Tag Team Turmoil tonight. Goldust says that Angle bringing up their bad win-loss record hurt him and he doesn't like how so many teams have passed by them in the tag division.
  • #1 Contenders Tag Team Turmoil
    • Enzo Amore & Big Cass vs Cesaro & Sheamus-Sheamus & Cass start with Sheamus beating up Cass in the corner. Cass turns the tables quickly before hitting a Stinger Splash, a bodyslam, and an Empire Elbow. Enzo tags in to get tossed at Cesaro & Sheamus, only to take a backbreaker from Sheamus before the commercial break. We come back to Cesaro stomping the sh*t out of Enzo Amore. Enzo manages to catch Cesaro with an enziguri, but Sheamus yanks Cass off the apron to prevent a tag. Cesaro catches Enzo with an uppercut and locks in the Sharpshooter for the submission.
    • Cesaro & Sheamus vs Heath Slater & Rhyno-Cesaro & Sheamus leave the ring and the two teams brawl at the entrance. Cesaro & Sheamus beat down Rhyno before throwing him into the steps. They then beat the piss out of Slater before throwing him into the ring. Cesaro stomps Slater and drops a leg, but Slater is able to come back with a wheel kick. However, with no one to tag, he is prone to a diving clothesline by Sheamus. Rhyno climbs back on the apron, but Sheamus boots him down. Sheamus & Cesaro manhandle Slater 2-on-1 some more before Sheamus hits a Brogue Kick for the elimination.
    • Cesaro & Sheamus vs Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson-This match starts during a commercial break, with Anderson & Cesaro going back and forth. Anderson is able to take control and tag in Gallows for a backbreaker/elbow drop combo. Gallows goes for a suplex, but Cesaro blocks it and suplexes Gallows. Sheamus tags in for a double-team straight jacket slam for a near fall before going to work on the arm. Gallows is able to fight back, but Sheamus floors him with a clothesline before going for a flying nothing, which Gallows counters with a superkick. All hell breaks loose, everyone gets their spots in until all four men are down. Sheamus hits White Noise on Gallows for a near fall before another commercial break. We come back to Gallows & Anderson hitting a back suplex/neckbreaker combo for a near fall. Gallows & Anderson go for the Magic Killer, but Cesaro breaks it up and clotheslines Anderson out of the ring, allowing Sheamus to Brogue Kick on Gallows for the elimination.
    • Cesaro & Sheamus vs The Golden Truth-The Golden Truth clothesline Cesaro out of the ring before hitting a double straight jacket leg sweep for a near fall. Goldust follows up with a bulldog, 10 punches in the corner, and a powerslam for a near fall. A Cesaro distraction allows Sheamus to knock Goldust out of the ring and tag in Cesaro, who drops Goldust knee-first on the barricade before bringing him back in. Cesaro & Sheamus target the leg of Goldust before Cesaro locks in the Sharpshooter. Truth is able to break it up and gets the hot tag. Truth runs wild, hitting a heel kick on Cesaro for a near fall and a front suplex followed by a scissor kick, but Cesaro kicks out at two. Cesaro dodges a corner splash and rolls up Truth for the win, giving him & Sheamus the #1 contendership for the Tag Team Championships after getting a clean sweep. After the match, Sheamus & Cesaro beat down the Golden Truth before the Hardy Boyz come out. The Hardyz come down to the ring, but Cesaro & Sheamus leave the ring and walk to the back.
  • Seth Rollins vs Samoa Joe-The two brawl before Joe leaves the ring and pulls Rollins to the outside. The two continue to brawl at ringside before Joe throws Rollins back in the ring, where he strikes Rollins into the corner. Rollins comes back with an STO into the corner, causing Joe to roll out of the ring where Rollins dives onto him. More brawling at ringside before Joe throws Rollins into the barricade. Back in the ring, Joe beats down Rollins in the corner, only for Rollins to hit a Sling Blade and make the cover, but Joe gets the ropes. Joe floors Rollins with a forearm. Joe then blocks a suplex and suplexes Rollins for a near fall. Joe controls the match until Rollins hits a Blockbuster. Rollins gets dropped onto the apron and gets his legs taken out from under him by Joe before the commercial break. We come back to the two trading blows before Joe kicks Rollins and hits an elbow drop for a near fall. Joe controls the match until Rollins blocks the Coquina Clutch and hits a jawbreaker followed by two suicide dives. Back in the ring, Rollins hits a springboard clothesline for a near fall. Joe comes back with a powerslam for a near fall before hitting an inverted atomic drop, a big boot, and a senton for a near fall. Joe goes for a powerbomb, but Rollins counters it and hits a Falcon Arrow for a near fall. The two trade blows before Rollins hits a superkick and an enziguri. Rollins goes to the top rope, but Joe pulls him off. Rollins pulls the pad off the turnbuckle in the process of saving himself and hits a superkick for a near fall. Rollins goes for his new finisher, but Joe counters and throws Rollins into the exposed turnbuckle. The referee tries to put the pad back on the buckle, but Joe tosses the pad away and rams Rollins head into the exposed buckle, getting him DQ'd. Joe throws Rollins into it again before applying the Coquina Clutch.
  • Gentleman Jack Gallagher vs TJP-Neville is on commentary for this match. TJP mockingly throws up two fingers at Gallagher, who dabs in response. TJP shoves Gallagher, who responds with a huge headbutt and almost wins right there. TJP rolls out of the ring, where he drop toe holds Gallagher into the steel steps. Back in the ring, TJP hits a slingshot senton bomb before applying a butterfly lock. Gallagher turns it into an inside cradle for a near fall before uppercutting TJP and hitting a dropkick. Gallagher follows up with an overhead suplex, avoids the Detonation Kick, and rolls up TJP. TJP rolls through and pins Gallagher with a handfull of tights for the win. After the match, TJP takes out Gallagher's knee with a chop block and locks in a kneebar. Gallagher gets saved by Austin Aries to enters through the crowd and who sends TJP running after a neckbreaker through the ropes.
  • Sasha Banks vs Alicia Fox-Fox slaps Sasha, so Sasha slaps back. The two brawl before Fox throws Sasha down. Fox hits a gorgeous Northern Lights suplex for a near fall before slapping on a headlock. Sasha fights out and reverses a tilt-a-whirl into a pin for a near fall. Sasha follows up with a headscissor takedown. Fox goes for the scissor kick, but Sasha dodges it, but Fox blocks the back stabber and rams Sasha into the corner. Fox sets up Sasha on the corner, but Sasha fights her off and hits a diving double knee takedown for the win.
  • Bray Wyatt vs Dean Ambrose-The Miz & Maryse are on commentary. The two go back and forth before Wyatt takes control. Ambrose sends Wyatt out of the ring and hits a suicide dive before sending Wyatt back in the ring. Ambrose goes for Dirty Deeds, but Wyatt escapes and suplexes Ambrose, who was hanging out from the ropes to the outside. Wyatt brings Ambrose back in the ring before the commercial break. We come back to Wyatt splashing Ambrose in the corner for a near fall. Wyatt controls the match until Ambrose dodges a second rope senton. Ambrose comes back with forearms, a clothesline, and flying elbow after Wyatt rolls out of the ring. Back in the ring, Wyatt hits a running shoulder block as Miz & Maryse leave commentary and come down to ringside. This distraction allows Wyatt to set up Sister Abigail, but Ambrose avoids it and rolls up Wyatt for a near fall. Wyatt comes back with an Uranage for a near fall before setting Ambrose on the top rope. Ambrose knocks Wyatt down and goes for a double axe handle, but Wyatt catches him with a punch. Ambrose rebounds and hits the Lunatic Lariat as Miz grabs the Intercontinental Championship. Ambrose takes out Miz with a suicide dive before throwing Wyatt into the barricade. Ambrose throws Wyatt back in the ring, only to get hit with the title by Miz. Wyatt brings Ambrose back in the ring and hits Sister Abigail for the win. Not really anything too good. After the match, Miz attacks Ambrose before saying he will win the Intercontinental Championship next week and everyone will recognize him as the champion.

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